review: tantus g-force

October 25, 2009 — badinfluencegirl

well the lovely folks at pinkcherry.com have brightened my life considerably lately and the first reason is the tantus g-force.  it appeared on my doorstep and just asked me if i wanted to be friends with it.

tantus makes really pretty toys, the silicone is this deep, rich wine red colour and there is a cute, little bulb on the end followed by a flexible, tapered shaft and a twisted handle.  the handle and the toy itself are differently textured, one is smooth and almost oily and the handle is a little rougher and slightly thicker.

the nice thing about the handle/shaft is that it’s actually bendable enough to hit your g-spot with the bulb and graze your clit with the handle, but i’m getting ahead of myself.  you can also feel the handle when you’re playing with your bum which makes you slightly less likely to lose it up there… but have a care.

i was dying of horniness when i pulled out this toy the first time.  dying.  there had been some bad sex with the guy from adventures in dating and otherwise nothing for ages AND i had just shaved my pussy for the first time in years.  so it had some help.

i dropped my still dripping from the shower body on to my bed and started to slide the bulb up and down my already soaked cleft and then realised that i’d better stop if i wanted to test the toy before i came all over my bed.  i mean G-force means g-spot right?

so i slid the now girl juice covered toy inside me and started to rock and roll.

and i rocked and i rolled and i rocked and i rolled and i gushed and i panted and i had a very good time but i never entirely managed to get my g-spot to take off.  i definitely made a little mess on my bed and i definitely had a lovely time but it wasn’t until i started to play with my clit manually or using the handle that i really managed to come.

somehow i could quite get my g-spot to really… how to put this… push.

so the next day, still horny, i thought to myself “self, you should really try this toy again so you can write the dreadfully overdue review already” to which i replied “good call” and grabbed some mineral oil* and the g-force and went to work.

interestingly i had the same experience both times.  i couldn’t quite get my g-spot to just really release me into a full blown orgasm.  i was rocking the toy and the hips and feeling it deep and low in the back of my throat but i just couldn’t seem to let go into the full slapping vagina wall experience.

so i said forget this, whipped the toy out of myself and stuck it in my ass.

except that isn’t how it worked.

the bendy handle/shaft, so awesome when applied to my clit while still stroking my g-spot with the bulb?  not so awesome for shoving the bulb into my bum.

it kept bending and (remember i was covered in oil) trying to slide toward my vagina instead and i eventually had to choke the shaft up toward the bulb (tough since it was covered in lube) and hold it really firmly to get it inside my ass.

this was actually a little annoying because i couldn’t work it in slowly.

my hands were so covered in lube (and really, this can’t be a problem, you’re supposed to use lube with toys and partners and so on especially if your ass is involved) and the shaft was so slick that i couldn’t ease or twist it in at all, i just had to shove.

i was really horny though so it was okay.

once i got it into my bum i pulled it out a bit and worked the shaft and then hit the bulb again and it was great. i really liked it in my bum, especially when i teased my tortured clitoris into a lovely gusher of an orgasm.

best part?  the simple design means it’s super easy to clean no matter how dirty you get it and even the handle comes clean with no problem. i really don’t understand sex toys with uncleanable crevices… particularly when they’re designed for your BUM!

[internet reviews suggest this toy is extra fantastic for women who like to masturbate on their tummies, and i can totally see that but i don't so i didn't.]

as always don’t use silicone lube with this as it will eventually kill a toy designed to last a lifetime.  proper cleaning involves a mild bleach solution or washing and boiling.  quick cleaning (never enough to clean a shared or anally inserted toy) is as simple as soap and water.

i’m having a hard time rating this one, the g-force is a really well made toy that mostly does what it says but i think it suffers slightly from trying to do too many things.

it’s awesome that the handle is bendy enough that you can stimulate your clit with it while still messing with your g-spot.

it’s great that it feels soooo good in your bum except that the handle is so bendy you can’t get it in without force, not so good for those new to anal play and it’s not huge so the experienced might want something bigger.

it’s great that it feels so good on your g-spot and slides into your pussy oh so sweet and that it feels so good sliding up and down your channel but somehow?  it can’t seal the deal with my g-spot.

so i’m going to give it an eight out of ten.  a good grade but not a great one and helped by the incredible material quality and extremely moderate packaging.  anyone who likes bum play that isn’t too too big but has a long shaft will love this toy and  anyone who wants to drive their partner wild with g or p spot stimulation will be grateful to the fine designers at tantus.  i would recommend it even though i don’t madly love it because it is reasonably priced and does a lot of things well enough.

.

* i have sensitivity to everything (get sex based cystitis OR yeast) and doctor said mineral oil was the most neutral to my body and to use that instead of lube.  sorry lube manufacturers, it’s freaking awesome.

Posted in random. 1 Comment »

adventures in dating

October 21, 2009 — badinfluencegirl

[i have edited my title and his on behalf of the reader who pointed out that i'm being mean, because i was... i still say it's pretty lame behaviour though]

[i had a party on the weekend, one at which nobody left until after one am and the room was filled with happy talking noises for many hours (and many of the people there knew no one but me.)

i was seeing an event planner/bartender and this was our fourth meeting... i lent him my spare keys to get something from his car and then he went home quite suddenly after sitting in the corner half the night... here is the morning after text conversation.

please enjoy - big]

*

him:

i have your keys.

badinfluencegirl:

that’s funny, i totally accused *randomsmokingman* of having them in his pocket <g>

him:

Now I really didn’t feel like getting into anything with you last night, but come on? What was up with you last night? I did not feel like i should have been there. You were way more interested in conversing with your friends…aside from a few token “checking up on me” I don’t think you think you said more than 10 sentences to me.

I’m very disenchanted

badinfluencegirl:

wow, you seemed to be having a good time so i was doing my host-ey thing and leaving you to it.  Since I thought you were staying over I didn’t really think you would mind me hanging with people I haven’t seen in a while.  I’m sorry that bothered you, I was delighted to see you when you arrived but funnily enough felt a little brushed off by you a few times as well.

I’m sorry you felt ignored, that was not my intent.

him:

Horrible evening. Quite upset actually. Yes I can be a trouper and mingle and make the best of things, but seriously you were either too drunk or too stoned…don’t do that to the next guy – it’s not nice!

I’ll drop your keys off tomorrow as I have to be at *storenearmyhouse* sometime in the afternoon.  Take care

badinfluencegirl:

wow, way to be uh… yeah.  not transparent at all *guy*, couldn’t tell at all what you were thinking except that something was wrong, and by then you were on the way out the door.  every single other person in the room took pains to tell me how much fun they were having… i’m sorry that for you a room full of interesting people is horrible.

good to know my instincts were right anyway.  i will be home after 3 and have clients from 4 on. and out again as of 6:30.

him:

That is pretty hurtful badinfluencegirl. You’ve managed to knock me down yet again…wow…classy!

I don’t think I’ll reciprocate or stoop to that. Not my style.

badinfluencegirl:

my instincts: after you left i turned to my friend and said ‘wow, i just got dumped’ … that’s all that i meant.i don’t really know why you feel insulted right now considering you just dumped me via text and informed me i was rude and hurtful and that what i thought was a very nice gathering was ‘horrible’

let me know when you will drop my keys off

him:

No. I will drop them off outside and call you when I have done so. I have no interest in talking to you.

badinfluencegirl:

omg seriously, tell me when you’re coming so i can at least be here.

[two days later?  my keys were dropped off to the super by a female.  so he's too much of a wimp to even take care of his own business... *shaking head* so yeah]

ps if anyone can tell me HOW i insulted him up there i’d love to hear it… (before he tells me i’m classless i mean)

Posted in dating, life, random, uncoupling, war stories. 13 Comments »

flash

October 16, 2009 — badinfluencegirl

every time i close my eyes i see it.

it’s never the same image and it never lasts long but it’s there.

sometimes it’s just a naked chest, rippling as it moves below me or a limpid look in a pair of eyes or buttocks flexing as they move.

sometimes it’s two bodies, the spaces between them opening and closing as various parts slide along each other.

or the sound of the breath that forms between two mouths and circles there becoming at once more than simply oxygen impregnated air.  becoming somehow possibility and magic instead.

the look of lips swollen with passion and heavy with promise.  intent gaze fixing on mine for a moment.

the soft sigh as a particularly tantalizing morsel of flesh is discovered, and devoured.

the feel of dense muscle bunching and flexing beneath seeking hands.  bones sliding under skin as bodies learn each other’s rhythms.

heads thrown back.

hands gripping shirts and tossing them to the side before lightly furred chest teases soft skin.

nipples crinkled long before the cool air reaches them.

mouth dropping to feast on over sensitized skin.

toes curled.

muscles tensing in response to a particularly teasing or arousing touch.  body arching for more.

bodies gleaming as sweat warms them, urgency growing and yet somehow not quite yet.

moisture pooling in my core.

it’s the sound of a groan as nails slide up dewed skin or the giggle as a body is manhandled into position.

it’s the feel of a head resting on my stomach and shoulders separating my thighs.

it’s the moment when two bodies align perfectly and still continue to dance rather than complete the circuit.

it’s the taste in my mouth of my teeth learning the joinings at elbows and thighs and shoulder to neck.  nibbling and biting and lavishing attention on the strangest bits.

the feel of my body ready and waiting and the little pulses that surge along  nerve endings even when i’m alone.

the deep heavy pulse in my vagina whenever i close my eyes and see it.

the feeling, deep in the bones, of that first entry and the anticipation that soaks any pair of panties i wear.

that deep languid feeling low in the pit of the belly that says not if but when.

the curiosity that will be sated.

the droop of my eyelids whenever my brain takes me back there.  back to the land of sighs and groans and skin and laughter and gasps.

i see the before; every time i close my eyes.

Posted in fantasy, fucking, hormones, life, random, sex, sex drive, sex fantasy. Leave a Comment »

pensive

October 9, 2009 — badinfluencegirl

yeah, this isn’t a sex post.

wait, where did everybody go?

whatever, i want to talk about this.

i smoke pot.  i smoke a lot of pot for people who don’t smoke pot and a pretty small amount compared to people who are chronic.  i am the beer after work definition of chronic rather than the falling down drunk version.

that being said, i have been thinking about this pot thing for a while now.

i used to not really worry about it.  it was something i did after work and i figured it was under control.  sometimes i even took a month off just to like prove to myself that i could.

i kept telling myself i would quit ‘soon’ but that i wasn’t worried about it.

except that i was.

i was worried about it and i wondered what it was i was trying to hide/run from with this drug.  i learned that anti anxiety medication is generally prescribed to folks who quit weed and i totally believe it.

weed settles me down.

it takes the forty seven hamsters running in the two hundred different wheels in my brain and reduces them to fifteen.  i’m still thinking too much but not about quite as many things.

i’ve read that people with add (which i have repeatedly been accused of having by women who are diagnosed with it) use marijuana to self medicate… and i believe it.

i would never have believed this add crap except that i heard how people with add react to meth.  crystal meth was my very favourite drug of all time.  crystal meth makes the world sparkle and everything come into focus and if ever a girl can be said to have loved an inert substance this girl can be said to have loved meth.

loved it.

still do but i haven’t done it in a decade or more… and will never consensually do it again.

i said that about cigarettes.

i said that about cigarettes and for eight years i didn’t smoke them and then i went to europe.

i went to europe and i didn’t have any marijuana and i bummed a butt.  and then i bummed another butt.

i smoked ten cigarettes in two weeks.

i smoked ten cigarettes and then promised myself when i came home that that was it.  but i’ve smoked probably ten more since i got home and each time i say no more i have another one.

always when i don’t have any weed.

and then i found out that potheads are prescribed anti anxiety meds and this was right about the same time that more than one really hot man (please know i don’t mean looks?) blew me off for admitting to smoking weed and i got to thinking.

i got to thinking that i knew why they were blowing me off.

because you know?  if i wasn’t a pothead?  i would be looking at me and thinking “what is it exactly that you are trying to dull with the weed?”

and i don’t know the answer.

and then i got to talking with this friend of mine.

this friend of mine who i love and would have married if he hadn’t met his wife before he met me.  it’s okay, we’re on each other’s ‘when i’m eighty’ list.  his wife is so awesome i almost hope i never get to shag him.  *clears throat*

we have smoked a lot of pot together he and i.  smoked a lot and talked a lot of deep truths and we got to talking about how we weren’t sure we wanted to be potheads anymore.

about how we didn’t really know why we did it anymore.  about how we weren’t sure we wanted to. about how the time was coming to quit but we weren’t quite ready.

but then i got to thinking some more… about how the problem with weed is that it steals your ambition.  it takes away the drive to do things and gives you some of that casual ease.

that’s the draw of course.

it’s relaxing and it’s a nice way to take yourself down at the end of the day.

but really, what is it that i’m trying to dull?

part of it is boredom.

part of it is frustration.

part of it really is the dulling effect.

but why do i need it?  what is it that i don’t want to face?

what’s changed that i’m smoking cigarettes (!!!!!) as though it’s okay and discussing bringing weed over international borders?

i mean what THE fuck?!?!

clearly something is going on.

so i guess i have some options (feel free to add to the list):

1. quit cold turkey.

2. quit cold turkey and meditate.

3. find a shrink, get drugs, quit, do counselling, quit drugs.

4. don’t quit

5. find a shrink,meditate, quit.

6. join narcotics anonymous.

7. some variation of the above.

i’m not sure which one to pick or what the good plan is, i would appreciate anyone with experience taking anti anxiety meds to comment especially… and anyone who has quit weed too.

it’s weird, i feel like i should stop and yet i’m not sure that i care.

which is, of course, the power of weed.

Posted in home remedy, life, marijuana, random, tobacco. 8 Comments »

disconnect

October 5, 2009 — badinfluencegirl

when i finally found my sex drive in my thirties i thought that i had found it.

i thought that knowing i had a sex drive and wanting sex would now be a permanent state.  but it isn’t.

it’s more like my ability to eat healthy and exercise.

sometimes it’s there and sometimes?  not enough will in the world.

these days i do cardio two or three times a week but i’m really aiming for three to four.  i do pilates a couple of times a week and otherwise i work on my feet every day.  i’m not eating well enough, i’m trying to but the carb cravings are killing me.

it’s some kind of comfort food thing, i haven’t been feeling very in the world the last few weeks.  i’ve wanted to stay home and watch television and eat pizza.  sort of wallow if you will.

i think, in effect, that i’m a little bit depressed.  not surprising, something always happens to be this time of year.  it’s my birthday and i guess it always gets me thinking about my decisions and my choices and who my friends are and what i want from my life and how i want to be living and.

i’ve been inside a lot.  i’ve discovered the sybaritic joy of oiling my skin after a shower or before a lovely masturbatory session at bedtime.  i haven’t really wanted to hang out with anyone i knew.

for some reason the only socialising that i’ve been in the mood for has involved new people.  strangers.

people around whom i can just be happy and quiet.  sort of be not sociable in a group as it were.  even if i’m sociable it’s that kind of light and easy conversation that’s not important.

you’re flirting, you’re not discussing the latest giant dramatic problem in the middle of your overly incestuous circle of friends.  flirting is easy.

putting your hand on the man’s shoulder as you reach up to speak in his ear and leaning your weight on his body to feel the hardness beneath the clothing.

touching the hair at the nape of a man’s neck because he says he’s in the military.  to see if it’s buzzed of course.

catching someone’s eye across a room and smiling a wicked little smile as you turn away.

you know, easy… candy for your soul.

my sex drive has been a little like my mood.

i’ve fucked myself so hard i’m sure the neighbours thought someone was giving birth next door but i haven’t even wanted to kiss the beautiful men.  i’m somehow deeply and fully alone these days and i’m not sure what, if anything, i care to do about it.

because see?  i’m kinda enjoying it.

i am noticing men and thinking about men and flirting heavily with someone but i’m in no hurry to get out of this disconnected place that i’ve been in for well over a month now.

i find myself hard pressed to care at all how long it’s been since i’ve spoken with friend x or y.  in fact some days i look at the phone and realise that if i don’t make this one call? i won’t talk to a single human all day.

part of this is the natural outcome of having a sociable job.  after a while the one thing you don’t want to do in your time off is speak with other humans.  i’ve found that people i date don’t really understand this and it gets me in trouble.

i’m a very extroverted person but i am also extremely solitary.  i go to restaurants and events and even travel alone and in some ways i like it better than having company.  with very few exceptions, the only reason i like to travel with people is to save money.

i imagine that if i met the guy for me we would either travel well together or simply take seperate vacations.

i can wander ten kilometres through a city and even stop for dinner and i will be charming and sociable with everyone i meet but maybe i won’t open any doors.  i will ultimately still be alone at the end of it.

and that doesn’t bug me.

it seems to me that as long as i manage not to drive too many of my real friends away while i’m hiding in an introspective yet sybaritic nest and so long as i continue to work enough then that’s okay.

it’s even okay if i also go out and meet people and go on dates.

because i am still myself, i’m just a little bit disconnected from it all.

but i don’t think it would be too hard to blink back into the full colour version of the world, i just don’t feel like it right now.  i feel like instead i’m finding things out about myself, maybe dating myself for a change.

i am horny all the time and masturbate pretty regularly.  i am reading lovely books and enjoying great tv shows.  i am eating too much comfort food but i am getting enough exercise so it balances out.  i am not wallowing in misery or wishing i was dead or whatever i’m just…not quite in the world.

and yet i have this quiet contentment all tied up with this unwillingness to get anything done.

i’m carrying condoms but i’m using them on a dildo.

interesting times.

Posted in blogging, condoms, dating, hormones, life, masturbation, random, sex, sex drive. 1 Comment »
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